Wedding Ceremony

Marriage is a must for the Balinese people to continue the generation and to keep the house private including the family temple. So a new couple is expected to have children.  In Bali is known with two different customs of getting marriage called kawin lari or  marriage by elopement and the other one is married by proposal, both are legal, more than 90% the marriages are by and the rest are by proposal, married by elopement is more romantic, they choose their partners by their own choice until both (girl and boy) really like each-other and then they pick the day for running away. The boy will keep the girl in his friend's home and as soon as possible he has to report to the cheap of the communal which then the new couple are protected by the community members, no strangers are allowed to come to the room where the new couple are hiding. After the sun is setting the new couple send a message to the girl's parent to tell what is happen, usually the message consists of two cheeps of communal "kelihan adat and kelihan dinas", and one or two relatives of the boy, they must bring a little lamp. Otherwise the girl's parent may refuse. Usually when the girl left her home for marriage running away she takes the best dresses and if possible to put offerings of canangsari at her family temple to represent that she goes away by her own choice in order the family is not so panic. 

After three days or in selected day a formal ceremony is arranged to formalize that the new couple is groom and bride and as soon as the ceremony over they are considered as husband and wife. The wedding ceremony is not attended by the bridge's family non-of the relative either and there is no dowry at all. In the same day or a day after the wedding ceremony the groom and the bride will go for a visit to the bride's parent to apologize of what they have done, usually they are accompanied by the whole community members and the close friends of the groom and bride but before they come a delegation is sent to tell that the groom and bride are going for a visit, if they are welcomed a visit can be done otherwise not at all that means the situation is in a critical and sad and also the  young couple may never go to her parent's home at all that means as well they are not blessed. A nice technique can be done as long as the young couple calm and wait until a baby is born just take the baby home usually most of the critical problems sorted out with tears go by.